Thousand Year Eds
by Mr.Miyagi241
Summary: Bored of their mundane routine that is called life; the Eds talked about having an adventure out of this world. What they didn't expect is for their wish to actually happen...
1. A Boring Afternoon

**1:00 P.M. Peach Creek High School, Colorado**

A bored look was on Eddy face as he and the rest of his crew were thrown in detention from another late arrivel at school.

They're detention room was located in the library of the school; this was they're 22nd late arrival at school.

To be honest they should've been suspeded but due Eddy's negotiation skills ((begging and crying)) they only got centrel detention.

"Why does it always comes to this?" questions Double D while he leans on the table with one arm over his head, almost as of he has a head ache. "Why is it that every time I hang around you two it always ends up so bad?"

Eddy turns his attention to Double D one eyebrow arched over his with a deadpan expression.

"Because you have zero to none self esteem; Me and Ed are litterlly the only other two people who would actually hang around you only because we're also outcasts."

Double D scowled at what Eddy said for what he said and was about to retort but only to realize Eddy was right so he turned back with a solemn "I had that coming didn't I?"

Double D asked. Eddy looking at Double D simply nodded.

Ed was doing his own his own thing as he somehow manage to sneak in comics in the school dozing off reading whatever the comic was about.

Eddy had enough, it's been a while since they last went into a crossbook adventure.

All it has been for a while is scams and school; while the former was funner then the latter it soon turned into a mundane routine.

"RRR I HAD IT!" shouted Eddy "ALL IT'S EVER BEEN IS SCAMS, GETTING IN TROUBLE, AND SCHOOL!" "EVERYTHING WE DO, WE FAIL! OUR SCAMS, OUR GRADES, ED'S AWARENESS OF HIS FILTH!" Ed stops reading for second to turn to Eddy in confusing "Huh?"

Ed wonders "EXACTLY!" Eddy calls out. "Eddy.." Double D calls out confuesd. "You don't have to be so frustrated just because we have detention."

Eddy turn to Double D with a frustrated look "That isn't the point Sockhead!" He said "Eversince our last adventure things aren't the same!" "I mean I still enjoy our scams, yeah! Don't get me wrong." "The love of money will never go away."

Eddy smirks with his eye half lidded "But it all got the same! It got boring, besides we were heroes! We were fierce! and respected!"

Eddy wrapped his one arm around Double D aggressively "Now look at us!" Eddy said as he gestures to himself and Double D. "WE ARE EXACTLY THE SAME AS BEFORE!" Ed shouts excitedly.

Eddy and Double D stared at Ed for a minute before continuing their coversation; "Look Eddy," Double D replied "I too yearn for another adventure, too discover new things and interact with new people,

but there hasn't exactly been anything we really wanted to do besides... we're not always going to this. Eventually these adventures will be over and we'll have to grow up and go our separate ways."

Eddy thought on Double D's words (on his words about having a common interest, not on going on separate paths) "Then why not think of one?"

Eddy asked as he gets excited "What is it that you really wanted to do?" "Well that's that's the thing..." Said Double D "I don't know."

Double D was shrugging as he said that. Eddy and the crew sat at the table brain storming for ideas that they would all like to do.

An hour later...

The three friends were still sitting at the table; each was doing their own thing: Ed was still reading his comics.

Eddy was playing with his yoyo that he snuck in, and Double D was reading a scientific article.

Each had a bored expression on their faces until Ed suggested something. "How about treasure hunting?" "

Why would we do that!?" Eddy asked "We did it once remember?

"And it ended awfully..." That was when the Vietnam flashbacks happened.

Of the horrible things Kankers did to them there was blood, screaming, and all sort of horrible things that were better to be unspoken of.

"Actually..." Said a voice "I wouldn't mind doing that."

Eddy and Ed turn their head which is Double D.  
"Besides we went on that last one because  
Eddy simply thought there was some treasure his brother left behind."

Double D explained "If we truly went on a treasure hunt think of all things we can discover on the way!"

Double D exclaim excitedly "Think about the monsters we could face!" Ed interrupted "LOTHAR WOULD BE REAL INSTEAD OF FICTION!" Ed explained as he rose raising both hands while also flipping the table.

While the table missed Edd, Eddy wasn't so luck; the table hits Eddy and sqaush him like a pancake.

Since this isn't reality with someone being seriously injured Eddy managed to get up with only being dizzy.

"Rrrrgh while all that sounds cool and swell you're forgetting one thing..." Eddy said; Ed and Double D were confuse "What's that Eddy?"

They both asked "**Cold...hard...CASH!**" Eddy explained as he the sinister expression that woulf make any James Bond villian jealous.

"If this treasure hunt's for real than we could be RICH!" Eddy had dollar signs in his eyes.

"We'd be on top of the world and respected! No more making fun of the Eds!".

As the Eds were all making conversation a book glowed on a book luckily it was close to the Ed so they saw it. Eddy was the first one who saw it "Hey look! Our wish is coming true! Hurry get it before someone notices!"

As the Eds scooped up the book; they opened the book and began reading the intro of the book called the Paper Mario and the Thousand Year Door.

Double D begins to read "It says here that a thousand years ago there was a prosperous town until a terrible storm hit." Double D turns the page " Everything was going to ruin so the town was forced to evacuate.

But not before sealing their treasure behind two large protective doors." Double D read; The page showed a picture of the town being flooded and harsh winds.

Double D continues to read "To do this they utilized the power of the Seven Crystal Stars. After that the stars dispersed all going to serperate paths never to be seen again."

Double D stop reading to ponder "That's odd, why would you need seal something behind doors that big?" It was Eddy's turn to speak "And why would you need magical stars to do that?"

Though they questioning the logic of the story the book started to suck them in. "Uh oh save the questions for later! CAUSE WE'RE GOING IIIIIIIN!"exclaimed Eddy; they started to scream as the book suck them in. So starts their adventure...

End of Prologue


	2. The New Arrivals Part 0

**2:30 P.M. Rogueport harbor docks, Mushroom Kingdom**

A black hole forms in the sky as our three protagonists fell straight out of it; each one of them having last thoughts through their heads.

Double D's thoughts of how he hasn't uncover all the worlds secrets and the fact that he's gonna die without investigating this new world's secrets.

Eddy's thoughts is on how he's hasn't done anything successful in life; and if he could take back anything; he would take back not doing enough scams.

Ed's... ok let's not kid ourselves here; he's thinking of what he's going to have for breakfast.

With these thoughts in mind; our three protagonists scream as they plummet to their deaths...(Ed's laughing), however there was a miracle that happened. Something that was soft and cushioned the blow as they land; something that's called a roof.

As each Ed slamed off each rooftop; they also yelp in aganizing pain until they landed safely on the ground...that also has a giant crater. A short stubby footed mushroom person called a Toad ran up to them almost as if he was concerned... but perceeded to dig through Eddy's pockets to loot him.

As Eddy woke up he felt something dig through his pockets, looked for the source and gave a powerful kick. The poor Toad didn't stand a chance as he flew screaming for his life only to be silenced by a garbage dumpster. As Eddy woke up the other Eds were waking up as well.

"Freak..." Eddy said as he was slowly ((and painfully)) getting up; "Maaaan my neck hurts, it feels like that time when me and Rolf were hit by that train." Eddy recalled.

As the other two Eds were getting up

Double D looked at the sky in curiosity "My word..." Double D said "We should've been dead! We fell from a 200 story drop!" Eddy rolled his eyes "Yeah, good thing the rooftops softened our fall." Eddy sarcastically said as he was snapping his spine back to place.

"Does that make us superheroes then?!" Ed ask as he got up like nothing happened and was excited when Double D mentioned that they should've died.

Eddy and Double D were really confused when Ed asked this question out of nowhere. "Wha- !?Super-!? NOOO ED!" Eddy exclaimed.

"HOW COULD YOU BE SO GIDDY WHEN WE ALMOST DIED!?" Double D asked shocked that Ed's first thought is that their superheroes.

Such a complicated question for Ed except that it wasn't. "Cause we didn't." Ed simply answered as he smiled stupily.

For once in their life; what Ed said is true they didn't die even if they should've. Double D looked at Eddy to discuss this phenomenon. "You know Eddy, I think he's on to something..." Eddy being ironically the most grounded of all three of them had something else in mind.

"Nah I don't think so Double D." "I think all those failed scams built some kind of pain tolerance in us." Eddy explained; Double D was surprised at Eddy explaination and vocabulary.

"Why Eddy, I'm surprised you came to that logical conclusion!" Eddy understood where Double D came from "Hey cut a guy some slack sockhead." Eddy said "I gotta somewhat pay attention in class otherwise I'll be as dumb as Ed." Eddy explained pointing at Ed with his thumb.

Ed in the background was chasing a butterfly laughing like the happy idiot he is; until he accidentally tripped and fell on a poor unsuspecting toad. Suffocating under Ed's huge weight and his awful hygiene until he didn't move anymore.

Realizing what he's (somehow) done; Ed panicked as he frantically looked around for a place to get rid of the evidence.

He spotted the dumpster and decided to hide the body there the excat same one where a toad Eddy kicked was.

Ed rushed to the dumpster; clumsily shoved the body in and went to acting normal, whistling as if nothing. Except that everyone was watching because it's broad daylight and in a very public area.

So this is the part where you expect someone to scream or yell and call the police as Ed committed manslaughter.

...But instead everyone went back to what they were doing. Either these people are really stupid or this was so common to the point where everyone stopped caring.

As the other two Eds just witnessed a murder the two contemplated what to do.

"...Anyway, Where are we?" Eddy asked as he decided to ignore what happened. Double D was a bit more skeptical and uncomfortable "Uuuhh, I don't know really. I guess we can ask around for information. " Double D answered as he still didn't take his eyes off the dumpster

"Sounds like a plan to me!" Eddy replied as he headed off to talk to the alice in wonderland knock offs.

Double D approached Ed as he was still right beside the dumpster whistling( Ed walked back to check on the dead body). "Uh...Ed?" Double D starting up the conversation.

"Yeah Double D?" Ed reply as he was sweating "You didn't just kill that fellow there did you?" Double D ask nervous of what the answer could be.

"Oh no Double D!" replied Ed "The little mushroom man is just sleeping because of a hard day's work!" Ed answered as he smiled nervously.

Double D looked at the dumpster than Ed than the dumpster and Ed once again. "...Why were you carrying him to the dumpster...?" Double D asked again getting increasingly nervous. "Because he need to sleep somewhere comfortable for the concrete is not comfortable, no siree." Ed answered as he was literlly sweatimg waterfalls (it smells horribly bad).

This confused Double D greatly "Huh- !?Wha-!? THAT DOESN'T MAKE ANY-!" As Double D began to lecture Ed; Eddy interpreted. COME ON YOU IDIOTS WE DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS!" Eddy shouted from the background. Double D looked at Ed as he tried and failed to smile innocently.

Double D points to Ed "We're not done here..." as Double D walked off. Ed looked back at the dumpster one more time as he also walked off "Just be in my happy place." Ed thought to himself. Finally it turns out that the toad is actually dead as flies begin to surround his body.

End of first chapter


	3. The New Arrivals Part 1

**3:15 P.M. Downtown Rogueport, Mushroom Kingdom**

* * *

The Eds walked around the docks asking everyone where they are; the answer was always the s  
ame.

"Sorry, but I can't help you." Said a toad worker; the Eds looked at each other confused.

"But it's just one question." Double D explained "Surely you could tell us where we are!" Double D said as he was getting frustrated.

Toad lifted up a crate from a pile of other crate (shipment) and turns to face the Eds  
"Look I can't ok? Not while I'm on the job. I'm not allowed to talk to anyone until breaks."

The toad explained; he then walked toward the ship to unload the shipment for whatever the ship is delivering to.

The Eds stood there confused on what to do next. "What kind of adventure is this?" Eddy asked "We've been walking around for two hours and no one told us anything!" Eddy said clearly getting impatient.

"You'd think they would at least be decent enough to tell you the NAME! Of the this settlement." Double D vented as he was really frustrated.

The trio continued trying to find different ways to gather information out of local but none to avail.

They tried asking politely ((Double D idea)), bribing them which would've worked if it wasn't the fact that their money was useless.

So they resorted to interrogation threatening poor folks to torture if they didn't speak; and it work everyone started to talk while worried for there well being.

"You know.."Eddy started saying "I'm starting to really like this place." He said as he's looting a poor innocent goomba being held down by Ed. Eddy starts to look at the loot "27 coins? Is that it!?" Eddy asked frustrated

The goomba looks up while still being restrained by Ed "Yo gee" the Goomba said sounding like some wannabe Snoop Dogg person "Ya'll going to regret messing with me! I'm from the East side my nizzle".

Eddy wasn't to impressed he kneeled down to face the wannabe gangster "Oh please that's whats they always say." Said Eddy as he had his sinister smirk "You're like the third person who said it this week."

Double D is looking from the corner of the back alleys worried to be found out at any minute "Would you two hurry it up!?" Double D asked frantically

" The corrupted authorities of this fine and dandy settlement could show up any minute!" Double D explained

"Alright alright, We're about done anyway; Ed stand him up" Eddy commanded

Ed got up on his two uncleaned feet while grabbing the goomba and standing him up as well. The goomba shakes Ed off and glares at him while he talks to Eddy.

"Ya'll lucky I didn't have any of my squad with me bois" the pitiful gangster commented "Or ya'll would've been jumped; I'm talking all ten of us stomping ya idiots"?

The oh so intimidating gangster ran off while calling for his mom. "What a wimp!" Eddy said as he tossing his earnings up and down.

"Boy oh boy you showed him whose boss huh Eddy?" Ed asked being easily impressed; "Yeah I did" Eddy answered back as he was rubbing his hand on his clothes "Sometimes I scare myself with impressive I am."

Double D was in the corner listening in on what Eddy said and appalled "HOW COULD YOU BE SO PROUD ROBBING THAT POOR INNOCENT PERSON!?"

Asked Double D "HE COULD'VE BEEN SAVING THAT FOR HIS FAMILY OR FOOD!" shout Double D "Of all the things we done, this is possibly the lowest thing we ev-!"

Double D was about to rant before their was an interruption "**SHUT. UUUUP**!" Eddy yelled "In case you haven't notice, WE'RE NOT IN PEACH CREEK! Eddy yelled

"We barley got by asking for info, our money was useless, and WE ATE FREAKING GARBAGE TO KEEP FROM BEING HUNGRY! Eddy explained

"So I don't wanna hear you complaining about how we robbed someone to get by!" Eddy continued lecturing "This is what it means to survive sockhead!" Eddy said

Double D glares at Eddy as Eddy glares back the two almost looked like they were going to fight until a growling was heard.

It was as loud as a fire alarm as it went through out the whole city with the citizens looking around in confusion and shock.

The Eds themselve were confused as they looked around frantically afraid it was some monster ready to devour them they finally looked at the source of the rumble to found that it came from Ed.

Ed was really just standing spacing out when he himself heard his stomach rumbling. "Ooof I'm hungry." Ed said as his massages his belly in an attempt to satisfy his stomach.

The other two Eds looked at each other than their stomachs, they haven't eaten for a while so the Eds went with a solution "Well.." Double D said "I too am starved and I'm getting really tired of eating garbage."

Eddy perked up and smirked "See?" Eddy asked "Don't you see how lucky you guys are having me?" Eddy asked again smugly

"Alright let's head to that inn to get some grub." Eddy said as pointing to the Inn

"Who knows we might be lucky to have enough to even spend the night there." Eddy explained as all three of them went in to the inn.

Little did they know the another person with a red hat and blue overall entered the same building to rest from his search of his missing princess.

End of Part 1 of New Arrivals


End file.
